Beyond The Romance: Why Paris Might Not Appeal To Everyone

Some people hate Paris or are simply indifferent. As a Francophile, it’s a bit unfathomable to me. But I know several people who hold this view.

And it made me wonder. Why doesn’t Paris appeal to everyone?

I personally adore Paris. But I can grudgingly see why some people might not. I mean, even some French people have a love-hate relationship with Paris.

Here are the factors that may come into play for you and help you decide whether Paris would appeal to you as a vacation destination. What is magical to some of us, is painful to others.

Big City Issues

Paris is a big city. I mean really big.

That doesn’t mean you can’t walk many places. You will just, at some point, have to use the metro to get from A to B, especially if they are on opposite ends of the city.

And, like every big city, Paris can seem busy, bustling, chaotic, and crowded. It has the usual big city problems like scams and pickpocketing.

In places, it might be a bit dirty, polluted, stinky, or smokey. You’ll have to watch for dog poop. And there will be honking cars.

If this big city reality vibe puts a frown on your face, Paris may not appeal to you.

In that event, you should simply head to Provence or the Dordogne in southern France instead to try out village life.

Rudeness Stereotype

I hear this all the time. The Parisians are so “rude.” So ubiquitous is this old saw that people who haven’t even stepped foot in Paris repeat it.

It’s simply not true. It’s really a matter of cultural differences.

Paris is just not Italy, Spain or Ireland. People are not naturally gregarious or ready to chat you up at the drop of the hat.

They don’t usually smile broadly or make direct eye contact on the street. That’s how the Parisians roll.

As an introvert, this policy suits me just fine. But, in general, Americans are more outgoing and expect to be gushed over when they’re abroad.

But you won’t be in Paris. Parisians are much more reserved and prefer to observe the proper formalities.

Don’t be pushy, demanding, or loud. That doesn’t go over well. And Parisians expect you to have good manners as well.

Don’t walk in a shop without a bonjour. And don’t walk out without a bon journee or bon soiree. Use s’il vous plait and merci frequently.

The truth is that most Parisians speak some baseline English or are even fluent. But you should learn a few phrases to keep the peace. And to be respectful, avoid starting the conversation in English.

Truly, the only thing that I think is rude are the occasionally snooty cafe waiters (or the staff at places like Louis Vuitton).

But it’s probably because they are just extremely busy. Or because you’ve asked for oat milk with your coffee or a doggie bag to go — against French etiquette.

So if you want super friendly locals, try a different city. Ireland is the friendliest country I’ve ever visited, for what it’s worth.

Perceived Snobbiness

A frequent companion of the rudeness allegation is the complaint that Parisians are snobby intellectuals.

I don’t think they’re snobs. But they live in a city whose ethos is that it is the epicenter of world art, culture, and fashion.

Arts and big ideas are valued, in everyone from the wealthy to the working class.

So, some Parisians, not unlike some Americans, believe in their own exceptionalism. That’s fine, Paris is an exceptional city. Don’t expect Parisians to change for you.

tulips in Luxembourg Gardens — Luxembourg Gardens — Paris doesn’t always look like this

High Expectations

Some people come to Paris with incredibly high expectations.

They’ve heard or seen in movies that Paris is the most romantic city in the world, the most beautiful city in the world, etc etc.

So, they arrive expecting a dream world, not a big city with the usual urban warts and bad weather.

But when their expectations don’t correspond to reality, tourists may be shocked. Some even suffer from the dreaded “Paris syndrome.”

No joke. This affects some tourists.

The Japanese especially are known to have the psychological and physical symptoms — hallucinations, panic attacks, and feelings of persecution.

Weather

Are you a beach person who likes warm, sunny weather? If so, Paris may not be for you.

Paris is actually pretty far north in Europe. Good weather is not its chief calling card. Rather, the city is known for its meteorological moodiness, a bit like London.

Paris is often gray, chilly, and rainy for months at a time. In winter, it can be frigid and dreary though it rarely snows. In summer, it can feel like a heat wave.

So, if you want guaranteed good weather or else your vacation is ruined, Paris may not fit the bill. Paris is more synonymous with culture than sunshine.

Museum Culture

The Parisians are obsessed with art and culture. It’s the very fabric of the city.

And Paris is a veritable art paradise, and Parisians are proud of that. The city simply oozes art, with more museums per mile than any city in the world.

For many Parisians, visiting museums isn’t just a tourist activity. It’s part of their lifestyle.

Museums often host temporary exhibitions, lectures, and cultural events that draw locals regularly.

people looking at Monet paintings at the Musee d'Orsay — Musee d’Orsay

If you are “not a museum person,” as I often hear people say, then some of the best bits of Paris will be lost on you.

It’s fine, we all have our own interests. But if you find museums boring or irrelevant, Paris may not appeal.

BUT don’t avoid Paris just because there are museums. You don’t have to partake.

In fact, nothing beats a leisurely stroll through a gorgeous Paris neighborhood like the Latin Quarter, the Marais, or Montmartre.

So you can just opt to stay outside, rather than inside. If the weather cooperates, that is!

crowds at the Louvre fighting to take photos

Crowds & Overtourism

Paris is one of the most visited cities in the world. It attracts tourists like moths to a flame.

This means it will be packed. Popular attractions like the Eiffel Tower, Louvre, and Notre-Dame can feel overwhelmingly crowded. Especially in summer.

Even the metro is oppressive. You’ll be cheek to jowl with locals and tourists. (It’s also notorious for strikes and delays.)

Indeed, in summer, you may hear more English than French spoken in Paris with the influx of tourists. This could lead you to feel like Paris is half theme park.

The problem, however, isn’t Paris per se. It’s often where you’re going.

Most visitors stick to well-trodden tourist paths and famous landmarks in central Paris. They miss out on quieter, more authentic neighborhoods.

This can lead to a feeling that Paris is “too touristy” or lacks authenticity.

The curative to this is to seek out some Paris hidden gems or maybe go on a hidden gems tour. Even when Paris is crowded, you can still find a secret spot.

Expense

Paris can be expensive, especially in tourist-heavy areas. You’re paying for the privilege of breathing in the Parisian air.

Dining, accommodations, and even basic necessities like coffee can feel overpriced.

This could leave budget conscious travelers frustrated. There are definitely many cheaper places in Europe to visit.

Slow Pace

Are you a checklist person hoping to blitz through the city and check off your bucket list?

Paris doesn’t make this particularly easy. The sites are far apart and it can take some time to get from place to place.

Paris is not just the Eiffel Tower or Notre Dame either. It’s a place of culture and experiential delights, not just the tourist route.

Meals take a long time in Paris. Nothing is rushed. It’s about enjoying the experience of good food or wine at a cafe, for example.

Many Americans are frustrated when the check doesn’t arrive quickly. But that’s just not how it’s done in Paris.

So try to embrace this slower lifestyle. If you want non-stop action, you can always patronize the excellent bakeries and grab sandwiches to go.

Just don’t be surprised if Parisians look at you oddly. They don’t eat as they walk and think it’s very odd. Different strokes.

Spontaneity

Are you a spontaneous person who likes to just wing it when you travel? I know plenty of folks like that.

But that’s not ideal for Paris. Paris is a place where you have to do some A+ planning to have an A+ trip.

It’s the most visited city in the world. It’s a busy place.

And the top sites and hotels will be booked months in advance. If you don’t pre-book tickets, you’ll be consigned to long lines or miss out entirely.

You absolutely must book tickets well in advance for these attractions:

Food

Some people simply don’t like French food — coq au vin, escargot, boeuf bourguignon, ratatouille. It’s rich stuff. And good salads are quite scarce, I’ve found.

I’ll admit myself that some French cuisine is a bit heavy and saucy for me.

I will also admit that it’s not easy being gluten free or vegan in Paris. But if you do your research, you’ll see that more restaurants of this type are popping up.

And I don’t see how anyone could tire of Parisian baguettes, pastries, or cheese. They are simply too divine.

And picking them up a your local patisserie instead of going out to eat while help on the expense side of things.

And that’s a wrap. What do you think? Will you love or hate Paris?

You may find these other Paris travel guides useful:

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